Well listen, it’s been a bit of a cold start to 2015, that’s true and we’ll admit it. But if we’re going to let you in on this little secret here, you’ll need to do a couple things for us.
1) Take a shower today. You haven’t taken a shower once this winter. Not once in 14 weeks. You’re covered in dirt. Take a shower.
2) Squats. Squatsss homie. Lots of ‘em.
Oh yes, you’re going to want to get those quads warmed up, and you may as well do it in a hot yoga class because that�...
Well listen, it’s been a bit of a cold start to 2015, that’s true and we’ll admit it. But if we’re going to let you in on this little secret here, you’ll need to do a couple things for us.
1) Take a shower today. You haven’t taken a shower once this winter. Not once in 14 weeks. You’re covered in dirt. Take a shower.
2) Squats. Squatsss homie. Lots of ‘em.
Oh yes, you’re going to want to get those quads warmed up, and you may as well do it in a hot yoga class because that’s the only way to practice WININ’ FOR 5 STRAIGHT HOURS IN A ROOM FULL OF SWEATY STRANGERS WHO LOOK REALLY GOOD IN ACTIVE WEAR.
YOU: “Will I be surrounded by loose acquaintances who tell me how funny and charming I am?”
US: “Hahaha. Well. Let’s get you out of those dry clothes and see where the night takes us”.
YOU: “Will there be cold pressed juice and a variety of cleverly named fresh bowls available?”
US: “Did you say fried chicken and waffles? Here’s beer now for your mouth”.
YOU: “Would you describe this as a ‘high thread-count’ affair?
US: “We sleep on a piece of foam that used to look a lot less beige.”
YOU: “Once the bass drops I don’t plan on making eye contact with anybody so just think of me as a fucking werewolf wearing hoop earrings.”
US: “You’re a fast learner. You’ll do well here.”
This is mob mentality at its best. Skin on skin, worn down high heels, soaking wet $20 bills, sore thighs, good stains, bad words, put your hands up.
-Dance Hall
-Hip Hop
-Bad grammar
-Yes Yes Y’all DJs
-James Redi + Jon Chetty
-Cracked phone screens
-Cash bar
-The Dirty Bird Chicken & Waffles
-Spelling errors
-Drinkz is 5 bucks
Prepare for a judgment free zone where different groups meet, mingle and make out. It’s a fete. Good vibes only. If you’re too cool to be nice, you’re boring and it’s time to leave. Enough said on that matter.
One plus one = too many possibilities. The mansion, the ballroom, the basement; and our parents are gone for the weekend. This is Nice Up 2. Welcome back.
NICE UP 2. Saturday June 6th. 10pm. $10. 519 Church St. DDBX. YYY.
*Hella proceeds go to the 519 Church St Community Centre.